(Originally posted 7 August 2006)
Rachel and Erin had swimming lessons on Saturday. This is not their normal day to go but they had been making up a missed day, earlier in the week. I wasn’t expecting my Mother and nephews until later in the day but as we were leaving, they pulled up. So after a quick Chinese Fire Drill (I hope everyone knows what this is…) my Mother Nicole and Danielle were left at home and I took my nephews Alexandre and Kasey with our daughters Rachel and Erin to the pool.
As we drove to the pool I tried to explain a few ground rules to the boys who have never been to our gym.
“Gentlemen, this is an indoor pool at a gym. There are not a lot of kids, mostly there are older people.”
Rachel interrupts to tell them “Yeah, and don’t look at the old guys wearing the Speedos because that is just WRONG on so many different levels.” (I almost swallowed my tongue!)
“Please try not to be rude, or splash these people. They are mostly swimming laps, so just keep out of their lanes.”
Rachel starts to interrupt me again, but I head her off at the pass… “And okay, yes, you should probably not stare at the gentlemen in speedos or any other person for that matter. Some do wear speedos or bike shorts or shorts up to their armpits, but do NOT stare, point or laugh PLEASE!!!” I'm trying to wear my sternest expression.
"The flotation devices are mostly for the elderly so please make sure you don't take the last one if you just want to paddle your feet. Oh, and the water volleyball? Unless you can promise that you have the ability not to hit the older swimmers, please refrain. They are very easy to knock out. Please don't ask me how I know this. Just chalk it up to a youthful blunder and leave it at that. The Styrofoam noodles are not for Jedi Master training, nor are they used as a type of baseball bat. Please just be mindful of your manners." I'm thinking to myself, 'Gawd, I hope I covered every eventuality!'
Rachel was going to continue adding her own descriptions but I finally just told her to change the subject because the guys were starting to look a little worried.
So we get there and after getting everyone signed in and changed, we head into the indoor pool area. Erin always has her lesson first because she turns blue faster than her sister. The rest of them jump in the pool and everyone is satisfied for the moment. When it is time for Rachel’s swim lesson, Alexandre decides to get out. We talked for a while not really paying attention to the rest of the pool residents (they always have a life guard on duty) until a much older gentleman enters the indoor pool wearing…yup…a speedo! I have to give my nephew credit. He only stared about as long as I did and when we looked at each other, I was the only one who couldn’t keep from chuckling. Quietly.
QOTD: "With 60 staring me in the face, I have developed inflammation of the sentence structure and a definite hardening of the paragraphs." ~ James Thurber