Weather Report Education And Changes...

Today's weather report is as follows:

6AM

-32°F, without the windchill factor counted in this morning as I dragged my toasty warm body out from under the Mount Everest of blankets.  '-'32°, did you notice that cute little the minus sign before the number 32 indicates the negative number of degrees it is below 0°F.  In other words it's really flipping cold up here! (I would like to thank my husband for taking the kids to school this morning so that I could go back beneath our Mount Everest of blankets.)

Just in case you slept through, were wadding paper for spitballs, writing notes to pass to your friends or were out sick with the Bubonic Plague the day the LESSON ON THE PROPERTIES OF WATER were taught in your elementary school class.  H²O that would be water for those of you who might not have been mentally available in middle school freezes at 32°F.  Now according to my old Anatomy & Physiology Textbook (I did pay attention in college... at least for this discussion), our resident doctor, a woman's body that would be mine, is made up of about 55% water, men are about 60%.  Which means there is the possibility that today I could be affected by the laws of temperature, the application of this kind of cold temperature you know... the ridiculously frigid air that only polar bears and penguins love, could freeze a person that would be me solid rather fast then, I too could become another member of our winter lawn decorations... along with the swimming snowman and snow sharks.  Therefore, the laws of temperature and the fact that I am a homo sapien, would seem to make it prudent ya think? to remain indoors preferably a heated indoors, because the possibility of freezing solid is ridiculously high.  Please try to limit your time outside without appropriate weather gear we're talking Nanook of the North level of clothing here, to a minimum.  Aye, Aye Captain! Remain inside my 68°F heated home... under our Mount Everest of blankets... pulled over my head, avoiding becoming a human popsicle.  I can definitely agree with that surmise. thank you so very much!  It sounds absolutely delightful.

10AM

I am delighted to report that the temperature has rocketed up 24°in the last four hours!  We are now at sitting at a very balmy -8°F...  with a windchill factor of -14°F.  As your local weather reporter, I am happy to announce that we should reach the positive single digits for a high today.  I'm wondering if his life depends upon accuracy?  I sure hope not.  I've kinda gotten used to him and his type of gestures.  I really don't feel up to learning a 'newbie's mime.  I  We will keep you apprised of his physical condition of the weather as soon as the reports are made available.


In other news, changes are happening here at The Lemon Stand's website.  How drastic those changes might be will depend upon the level of frustration reached by the construction crew, in other words, ME available talent's schedule .  Should we go off the air, it will only be very temporary... I Hope.  Please stay tuned...

QOTD: "Weather forecast for tonight: Dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning." ~ George Carlin