03 November 2009

Do Chinese Kids Try to Dig Their Way to America?

My family was sitting down at a restaurant having lunch. The question was actually stated more like this:
“When Chinese kids go out in their back yards, and they start to dig a hole, do their Mothers yell out the back door for them to stop digging a hole to America? Do they use a shovel made in the USA?”
I bet that you are wondering right about now, what prompted one of the kids to ask this question. Unless you were John or Kelly :o) They would know that this question did NOT come from one of the kids but from my very own Husband. And I don’t have to wonder where THAT memory came from. I can see his Mom in my mind’s eye. She’s probably telling him to put the dirt BACK in the hole. I wouldn’t presume to know what she was thinking, but if I had a child as prone to mischief (euphemism judiciously used here) as he was, I probably would have just told him to go ahead and dig it deep enough so that nobody would find his body when I came over to fill it in over his corpse.

The Husband is one of 7 kids. As a matter of fact he is #6. I hope he doesn’t mind me posting this here but I gotta tell you that I’m SURE his parents have attained Saint status. Especially his Mom.

My husband says he was kicked out of Sunday school at a very early age and many people can’t imagine why any church would do this (especially when he tells the story with such a straight face) but then you’d have to know some of the other stories that came out of his childhood.

His mother banned him from going into any stores for about 7 years because he would hide in the clothes racks from her. He wouldn’t come out when she called or got worried. Then one day he did that and then went to a store manager and told him that his mother had left him. Guess that was the last straw. I don’t blame her. I would have blown a gasket.

He once carved one of his brother’s names on his brother’s bed, just so he could see him talk his way out of it. Admittedly, his brother could talk himself from a hubcap to a car in very little time (he had an amazing gift) but this was a pretty mean blow. I was so happy when my husband told me that although his brother didn’t rat on him to his parents, he beat the snot out of him later. :o) Don’t you just love to see justified paybacks really do happen sometimes?

My husband really has too many historic family events to ever get them all in writing but I have to tell you that he also broke a different brother’s ribs with a wrist rocket once but then again, Karma really does happen. His brother returned the favor by pushing him down a set of stairs sometime later. The landed on both of his hands trying to break his fall. Instead he broke both his thumbs. At the same time. No opposing digits working. Imagine, if you will, trying to button a button, zipping a zipper, picking up and holding silverware, a cup, etc. without opposing digits. Yep, Karma at work.

Nowadays, my husband calls up to apologize to his Mom. Often. It’s that Karma thing coming around again. The pre-teen and teenage years of his own children. I can hear the laughter of fate in my mind…
QOTD: “It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.” Anonymous
(Originally posted on 30 Jul 2006)

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