01 October 2010

The Funeral Of The Purple Cast...

So I had a lovely visit with the orthopedic hand surgeon today.  In fact, we had such a lovely and long visit that we are now BFFs!  No.  Really!  In fact, I think we'll name our next child after her.

Apparently the MRI from H E double hockey sticks (deserving of it's own post) showed no broken bones. That was such great news that I wept.  Really.

So, after they cut my stylish purple cast off (By the way, note to self... bring lye soap and a really good scrub brush with me the next time.   Either that or a nose plug.  Or at the very least a biological weapons expert because I really thought the stench of my unwashed arm/hand should have been setting off Homeland Defense alarms everywhere!  If they could have bottled that aromatic fragrance for military use we definitely could fend off hoards of angry terrorists with just a tiny, microscopic whiff) so as I was saying, before I so rudely interrupted myself, I am now the proud owner of far less chic arm/hand attire.  It does have Velcro so it can't be all that bad...  and they do say that black goes with everything, so how can I go wrong?

I also got a nifty new kind of ice bag that can actually be wrapped around my wrist, but since it is well past Labor Day, I don't think I could wear it as a fashion accessory (since it is white).  Still, no one but the husband, five daughters and four cats would see my fashion faux pas.  Particularly because I have no plans to leave this house until my excruciating, migraine wracked head and agonizing swollen wrist/hand do not look like they belong on Quasimodo instead of on my dainty, feminine form.

See?  Whining can be raised to an art form.  OK.  I'm done sniveling.  I can remove my ad to sell the kids on eBay and they can be 'fairly' sure I won't rip their head's off.  (As long as they can behave like the well-mannered offspring that I often have delusional  hallucinations about...  or I don't see or hear from them for the next twelve hours...  otherwise, all bets are off...)

Can you tell the pain medication is kicking in?  Thank you for the diversion this post provided.  I was sufficiently distracted so that I really didn't seriously entertain the thought of chewing my arm off sans anesthetic or trying to rip out my brain through my nostrils.  I'm sure I'll appreciate being fully intact on the morrow.

We now return you to your regular Friday night programming...

Notes for the unfortunate readers of this misery:

First off, this appointment was a week ago (as in LAST Friday) and I am feeling much better.  The swelling has gone down and the pain only comes from the nerves in my wrist that will take a little longer to heal.  I only mention this because posts are being typed one handed... or rather one finger at a time so I am trying to pace myself...  hence the length of time it took me to get this posted.

For those people not in the 'X' generation and who need translation of the term BFFs (welcome to my life, by the way...  I had to ask one of my teenagers) - Best Friends Forever

Anyone who recognizes the movie line I blatantly stole... no doubt you'll know I may have watched 'The Mummy' a few too many times.

As for life in general at the moment... It's just Ducky!  Thanks for asking.   (somehow I have misplaced that ad for eBay and my index finger is developing a callus so the kids are momentarily safe...)

And lastly, to Air Force Wife...  I guess I am susceptible to a double dog dare after all... 


  1. hooooray! Im so glad you are feeling better, and that your free from the purple cast! I totally know that post-cast-removal 'smell' you are talking about! UGH!

  2. LOL!

    Wow! I didn't know you'd been through all this, Lemon. I'm glad you stopped by my place, though. Evidently my Google Reader had misfired, and your posts weren't showing up...for a long time now.

    I just assumed you had been on a hiatus. I reloaded your URL, and posts show up, so I'll be reading.

    I know of what you speak about cast stench...has an aroma of it's own that one does not soon forget. Glad you're on the mend!

  3. Meleah and Andy - The stench was a definite surprise! There was absolutely NO sinks in my cubical and no way to find one easily and then I remembered the small container of hand sanitizer in my purse. It still didn't help a whole lot. It truly did need a scrub brush.

    This has been a learning experience. I have learned that there are an amazing amount of things you can do with one hand and then there also are an amazing amount of things you can do with one hand. Some of them quite unexpectedly.

  4. Yaa, I see that happening soon in our household... the cast. Though the thought of putting out an ad for my children is creeping deeper into my brain. ;-) Having had a couple of cast, the stinch is worse than skunk. Sorry you had to go through all of that, but happy you are feeling well enough to post!

  5. VW Bug - I still say that we should find a way to bottle that aroma... at the very least, I could use it like pepper spray. :o)


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